When plans change
Newsflash. When your goals, dreams, wishes, ambitions, desires and aspirations are intertwined and/or contingent on another person, it is best to expect the learning/outcome to be greater patience, resilience, flexibility of thought, perseverance, compassion and dedication rather than what the goal itself was!
I smile as I write this from my experience on Monday although it was just one of several over my 49 years. I had planned (both with thought as well as schedule) to meet with my dance teacher in the morning at 10 AM. For those of you who know the importance of this meeting, know what it meant to me. This was my first scheduled meeting to begin practice and formulating a plan for my dream dance performance around my 50th birthday next year. I have been talking about it to my family and close friends. I started the ball rolling at least conversationally and more importantly, by setting the intention. I was looking forward to 10 AM and I organized my entire day around it. This appointment was one carrot that pulled my wagon through the weekend with a lift in my heart. In short, I was rather excited.
My morning catch up of texts revealed that the appointment wouldn’t happen after all. I watched my internal system feeling the wave of let down, the thoughts swinging like Mowgli releasing the happy, cheerful thoughts vines and swaying over to the disappointed, angry ones of “not one thing ever goes as planned!” I felt the momentary dread of dealing with the now open huge block of time. This time was not only an unwanted time, but I had worked quite hard to plan this scheduled time and ensure it would happen at my end.
A few breaths into these waves and Mowgli thoughts and emotions, I was offered the news flash by a little voice inside. I was reminded this is how it has always been with all my dreams and aspirations. They have always come with their own agendas, their own networks of complex happenstances, and have egged me on to dance to their rhythm. But ultimately, they set themselves free and unravel with a drumroll.
After the initial rise of the emotional tides, the waves now began to crash and flow forward. The Mowgli thoughts found the grounded vines of resilience again. The voices inside that reprimanded me with “shouldn’t have counted chicken before they hatched!”, now began to reassure me with “Well, the hatched chicken will be robust and worth the wait while the ones that didn’t see the light of day were a lesson in themselves.”
Slowly (well actually in a few short minutes, as this is a practice makes perfect kinda situation) I reframed my day. I saw the huge block of time as an opportunity to do other things for self care I have been meaning to do but complaining I couldn’t.
I moved forward in the day with a new regard for the word patience. Patience is not just a virtue that facilitates waiting for something to happen. Patience allows us to go through the process that we without judgment as an observer. I will eventually get to my goal. However, the outcome of greater patience, resilience, flexibility of thoughts, perseverance, self compassion and dedication will be the true cherry on top!
